Thursday, 9 December 2010

Like I mentioned in my previous entry, through all the experiences I went through this year I've become a different person than I was before I came here. At the beginning, I didn't like my new self. But while I do not see myself liking this new me, I've slowly come to terms with my identity.

It's really funny, how when you're living abroad and alone that you do not tell someone about your problems. I, too, had thought that I was the only one who went through what I went through. Fortunately, as time passed by I began to realise that many people went through the same experiences as myself. Life was definitely easier when I had people around me who understood what I was going through.

 This book sure looks interesting!

 Then today, when I was browsing through some blogs, I came across something similar.

When I cried, it didn't feel like I was crying because I was in America, and far from home. I was crying because I realized how much I hated who I am right now, when before I had loved it. I hated how I don't need people - and dislike people. I hated how I'm such a self-important bitch. I hated how I can't do relationships. I hated how personal success is the only measure of happiness to me. I hated how I don't think humans provide any value to me.

Most of that, I went through as well. If only more people talked about this, then perhaps more would know about how living overseas is. While of course there are some people who have no problem moving to another country, for others it is extremely tough. Being on your own, in a foreign country, is not the easiest thing to do- I speak from personal experience. But it is also when you begin to see the world in a different light, and begin to comprehend how large the world is. It's life- you lose some, and you gain some.

In last week's episode of Survivor, the talk about how difficult life can be came up. As this season was old vs. young, the host asked one of the older contestants about what the younger players have yet to learn. Her reply? 'Life is not a piece of cake unless they've got an easy ride from their parents. You don't have a clue what's around the corner.... life is full of rocky roads'. While it may not sound very wise, if you watch the episode you'll understand what I mean.

In line with this post, I'll end with a movie trailer. It's one of the movies I'm waiting to watch when it comes out, for many reasons. Life lessons is just one of them.

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